{LOCKED OUT! HELP!|STUCK OUTSIDE! NEED HELP|TRAPPED OUTSIDE: SOS!

Ugh. It's happening again. I swore/promised/vowed myself I wouldn't do this/forget this/be so careless but here I am, totally/completely/utterly locked out. My keys is inside/in the house/trapped in there. It's freezing/scorching/humid outside and I have no idea what to do/try/attempt. I checked/looked/searched everywhere for a spare key/hidden key